Christmas Wish List

This is not your traditional wish list. Forewarned is forearmed.

1) I wish I had more than two days before I leave for Arkansas to do twelve loads of laundry, pack, and wrap each and every present I've bought.
2) I wish airlines didn't charge seventeen million dollars to fly my Christmas presents to Arkansas.
3) I wish I had gotten to the Automated Postal Center just three minutes earlier and avoided the apparently illiterate person in front of me who needed to mail thirty-three packages. I know it seems harsh, but "apparently illiterate" is the absolute nicest thing I could possibly say about her. And waiting for her was still faster than waiting on a United States Postal Service employee to eventually get around to serving me.
4) I wish I didn't have sixteen reports to write at work this afternoon. Perhaps if I had started writing them yesterday, or even this morning, or even right this very second, life wouldn't be so rough.
5) I wish I hadn't eaten that third piece of pepperoni pizza for dinner last night.
6) I wish the Lowe's Facebook Gift-a-Thon had worked properly this morning allowing me to purchase a Kitchen Aid Mixer for $15.
7) I wish I had not let my temper get the better of me when I fired off all those quippy remarks to the Lowe's Facebook Gift-a-Thon administrator.
8) I wish I could identify just which sleeping position it is that's causing my neck to rebel against me.
9) I wish more people knew the difference between "your and you're," "there, their, and they're," "its and it's," and "to, two, and too." I'd get a lot more done at work if I wasn't editing the Internet.
10) I wish, since Jarred and I are exchanging gifts tomorrow night, that I had bought Jarred a gift.
11) I wish the box of chocolates Jarred received at his work party had come with a guide as to what you could expect when biting into each piece. I had an unfortunate incident with some spicy gelatin-type substance last night that I don't care to repeat ever again. I pride myself on my chocolate guessing abilities, but this was impossible to identify and I suffered greatly for it.

If all of these things had happened, I can personally guarantee there would be Peace on Earth today.

I'm not nearly as cantankerous as this post might lead you to believe. I'm actually very thankful and excited to have the next two weeks off of work. I'm also thankful that I get to spend it with my family. I'm sad that Jarred and I won't spend our first Christmas together, but glad that we get to enjoy our individual family traditions one last time before we're married. I'm thankful for the freedom and opportunity to worship our Savior on the day (or approximation thereof) of His birth. Finally, I'm thankful that the above stated nuisances are really the only things I have to complain about and, of course, I only jokingly complain about these things. I have a great job, my health, my wonderful family and future family, a warm place to live and all the happiness I could ask for.

Praying each of you has a Merry Christmas and a wonderful New Year!